Some of the best memories with you

1. when I was little and my stepdad promised me he’d take me to Linnanmäki, and then he suddenly said he didn’t have motivation to, and I was really upset, and my brother took me there instead and we played games and he pretended I had won prizes and spent all his money on me though he didn’t have a lot.

2. On New Year’s, he saved my day. He nagged all his friends to go to the club I was in, so we could spend time. Made sure we had fun, made sure I had enough to drink, bought me and my friend mcdonald’s, stayed by my side.

3. When Paul and Sander was here, and my brother helped me prepare, and also wanted to meet him because he must accept a boy before I can hang out with him. And as always, he was so proud showing me off, telling I was the best girl in the world and that I’d be the best wife in the universe.

4. When he took me to the cinema. We watched Hancock and ate mcdonald’s and talked, and also all other times we watched movies together. And for being there on my school graduations and everything when I had no one else there. No parents, no relatives. My brother, though. I didn’t need anyone else as long as I had my brother.

5. The boatride to Sweden. He bought me and Alex a pack of ciders and partied with us. He hung with us all the time and ditched every girl because he was now hanging out with his little sister. Got my back, other boys weren’t allowed to talk to me. He kept my secrets safe. Was always there for me.

6. When he called, because he wanted me to be the first one to hold his new-born baby-boy.

7. When he took me to Serena, because I’d never been there before and no one else would take me. My brother did, though. He took me everywhere.

8. Christmas. He bought me a present, and I loved it. And when I turned nineteen, he was in Italy, but when he came back he gave me 20€ and said to my mom later ‘I have to buy a real present for Laura when I have more money’.

9. When he gave baby as a present to me, so I wouldn’t feel so lonely when mother left.


10. For last week. The last day I had with him. I wish I had spent more time with him. He was so proud, showing me off to his friends, saying ‘this is my little sister’, and also warning anyone and everyone from touching me, or even looking at me too much. He even showed me off to the Bouncer 'This is my little sister!!’ As if he’d care. Then he invited me to after-party and morning party and I just wish I’d spent more time with him. He threw a gofball to each other outside of Kamppi. He paid for everything. I miss him so much. This hurts so much. This will hurt forever.